Coulrophobia, or the fear of clowns. I have been afraid of clowns since I can remember. My parents took me to a circus when I was little, or so I am told and since then, I have not been able to be near a clown. I also watched IT with my brother when I was young also, so that could also play into the fact even as an adult I am terrified of clowns.
I have even tried getting over this fear a few times. A few Halloweens ago, I tried my best to go up to a house that was dubbed The Clown House. I was with my oldest, she was maybe 6 or so years old at the time. We made it to the door without me panicking and tearing down the street to get away. As I was walking away with my then boyfriend and Skyler, One with a chainsaw kept getting closer to me. He started it up and rushed us. Yup. Bye Bye Skyler and Boyfriend. I took off running down the street. At least the boyfriend took care of Skyler.
My next fear is Haunted Houses. Its funny because I am able to go to places that are supposedly haunted, and explore there looking for ghost. But, If you get me into a Haunted House Attraction like Scream or Transylvania here in the DFW are, and I am crying like a little baby to get out. I really do feel like I will have a heart attack inside of one of these attractions.
Years ago, my friend Brittany and I went to the ones inside of Six Flags Over Texas. I don’t remember the name of it, but it was full of Vampires. Brittany still thinks I dislocated a few bones in her hand that day. Long story short, my flight or fight response was kicking in. I couldn’t find a way out, so I was about to start fighting this one actor that was up on my back. Another one approached me and asked me if I needed out or if I would like her to escort me through so I could finish seeing the rest of the attraction. I did choose to stay with her escort. She kept anyone else from jumping out at me thankfully. I also tried Meltdown when it was here also. It was said to have been a science lab gone wrong. Long Story short on this one, I made it into the first room when a boom happened and I could see the first actor in the corner, I turned around and started banging on the door to let me out. They did, but I was chased to my car. Yeah never again will I try that.
I also fear being alone. Up until I meet Mr. James, I was honestly beginning to believe I would be alone and I would never find love again. I am afraid that when my children grow up, that I will never see them again, that they will turn against me like my brother did to my mother. I don’t want to be alone, but I know I also need my space. Pretty much, I want to be around people, but not always have to be doing something. Even just being in the same room doing our own thing is a comfort to me. I honestly hope that things always go well with Mr. James and I. We really do seem to be a lot alike.